先日たまたま通帳を切り替えに行ったとき、大二の時の給与記録を見つけた。その時、私は夜間部に在籍していて、授業時間は午後3時半から夜10時までで、還有輔系があった。半年間、I worked as a morning shift editor at CTi News Taiwan, working from 5 am to 2 pm.
Every single day, I rode my bike from Xinzhuang to Neihu at 4 am, and rode back at 2 pm. The commute took two hours each way. I slept at midnight, woke at 4 am. With typhoons and major events preventing days off, my hourly wage was 100 TWD, yet I made 24K a month — that meant I worked over 240 hours monthly. Those days were truly exhausting. I only slept 4 hours a day, did assignments when I got home, filmed on weekends after work. After just six months, I quit because I decided to prepare for graduate school.
I remember clearly that year was 2010, June 11th, when I reported to the TV station. I'd originally found the part-time job on PTT. To be honest, I wasn't that interested in news. I just saw classmates working at media companies and thought I should look for internships at relevant companies too. Before this, I'd worked in restaurants, law offices, and factories. Rather than waste time, I figured I should prepare for my career after graduation.
Entering the company was a shock. CTi and TVBS were competing for first and second place back then (sigh, how times change), so everyone had to stay sharp. Even interns like me had tons to do. It was still the era of "running tapes," and I had to use "linear editing" to cut afternoon previews. The pressure was immense. I'd get scolded and cry every day, even bullied by interns from non-related majors who'd started two months earlier.
But this didn't discourage me. Instead, I was deeply attracted to the pressure and urgency. I thought the job was incredibly challenging. But looking at the people around me, they were as busy as dogs, while the higher-ups with degrees were relaxed, managing from above. That's when the idea struck me to prepare for graduate school. I decided I wanted to become a journalist in the future.
That day was June 23rd. I brought my deposit and went straight to Guojia Cram School, saying I wanted to prep for "Dairans" and "News Research." I was only in my second year — usually people start preparing in their third year — but because I was in Fuda's night program, school mostly involved doing presentations and filming. It wasn't only journalism either. So I decided to study at the cram school for two years to supplement my knowledge and start fresh from theory.
In just 12 days, I transformed from having zero interest in news to walking into a cram school saying I wanted to prep for graduate school. It was a huge change. Beyond the education issue, I felt I lacked knowledge and substance. How could I convince anyone of my abilities as a journalist or editor if I didn't have the fundamentals? But I really had no talent for studying. What takes others three hours to master takes me a week. So that summer, while classmates relaxed, I worked from dawn to afternoon, then attended cram school from 5 pm onward. After the semester started, I went twice a week until I quit.
↓一杯の読書記録資料（当時の携帯のカメラ画質が悪くて…笑）
In my final two years before graduation, I worked full-time in administration at school while preparing for the graduate entrance exam. I joined two study groups, submitted weekly assignments, prepared application materials, did mock interviews, and put in so much effort. That period was truly fragile because I didn't know if all this time spent would lead to acceptance. What if all this effort only kept me at the same private school level? Would those two years of hard work be wasted? I constantly had such doubts.
I remember applying to 9 graduate programs for recommendation-based admission. The application fees and preparation materials cost about 30,000 TWD. A professor told me, "You must apply to both national and private schools. If you only apply to a few and none accept you, it might make you feel like no one in the world wants you." When schools released results, National Taiwan University and National Chengchi University didn't have my name. National Taiwan Normal University called me for interviews with all applicants, but I was only 2nd alternate. Watching all my classmates get accepted while I didn't was incredibly stressful. I'd worked so hard.
My despair reached a point where I cried in front of my professor and lost confidence. Two days before my National Chung Cheng University interview, I couldn't muster the energy to prepare. I just hid and cried. I couldn't imagine going south to study. When submitting materials, I even asked my professor, "If I get in but don't want to go, do I still need to submit?" It was my professor saying "You must" that made me send it. By then, National Chung Cheng was my only hope among national schools. In the end, I was accepted to five schools total and entered National Chung Cheng University's graduate program.
↓中正大学の裏山、本当に美しい
Those days were truly difficult. Even after enrolling, because my level couldn't keep up with classmates, I had to read hundreds of pages of English papers weekly and participate in class discussions, yet had nothing to say. Sometimes I couldn't speak at all. The professor would even check my notes to see if I'd actually read. I faced countless setbacks. But whenever I thought about why I so desperately wanted graduate school, how much I suffered at the TV station, I'd tell myself not to give up easily. Eventually, I overcame my biggest fear — statistics — and my thesis used quantitative research with both SPSS and AMOS structural equation modeling. I even became a teaching assistant for junior classmates.
From being a private night-program student, overcoming every setback to enter National Chung Cheng University's graduate program — from struggling to keep up on day one to becoming a teaching assistant — it was all because of those two characters: "persistence." I didn't want to betray the person I was who worked so hard. I didn't want those who looked down on me to continue doing so. Persisting helped me shed the stereotype of a private night-program student. That's how I've gotten here.
I want to say: no matter how much pain you're in, how lost, how anxious, or how much you want to quit, if you still want to complete something, you must persist. Don't give up halfway. Life happens only once. If you don't do it, you'll regret it. So be brave and do it.
【Afterword】
Many things were meant to be. I'm so grateful I chose National Chung Cheng University. These days I often think about going back to Chiayi to visit my professors, returning to campus to recharge. Those days when I could work hard on things I loved were incredibly precious and irreplaceable.
↓その時間は本当に心を充実させてくれた
