By Karen /Original URL
When it comes to jealousy, these three words are often considered a "negative emotion." Think about it—when jealousy arises in your heart, don't you immediately want to get rid of that feeling, as if there's a sense of guilt, a cognitive dissonance? So you rush to look at things positively, trying to smooth over that sensation?
Actually, jealousy itself is a good thing.
Using my own example, since university, I have "envied" some friends around me and people in my surroundings who could live lives free from worries—vulgarly put, that carefree existence without burden. It gave them the freedom to choose, to do what they wanted, and they often accomplished more than I did.
One day I wrote in my status "refusing to be ordinary." Once, as I was thinking about it, I accidentally shed tears in class. My close friend saw it, so I quickly lowered my head and wiped away the tears, pretending nothing was wrong. That friend instead comforted me that day, saying "ordinariness is a blessing."
Back then, I couldn't quite understand this feeling of admiration—I only felt inferior, as if no matter how hard I tried, I could never be like them. Until I grew older and looked at my own experiences and abilities from an objective third-person perspective, I realized I had actually reached a point where I could establish my own value. Yet I still felt there were many shortcomings.
Often we blame ourselves for not being excellent enough by using others' achievements, and we get jealous of others—how can they live such a good life? For instance, traveling abroad once every one or two months, not just to nearby Japan and South Korea, but to Europe and America. Sometimes I even felt childish for envying others.
But later, I understood a truth: clarifying the origin of jealousy allows you to dissolve the sense of imbalance. Because many "achievements" are not things you can't attain—rather, they depend on yourself: whether you execute, whether you make the effort, whether you persist, whether you take the risk, whether you close the door behind you. Don't just look at others; instead, examine what resources you have, then think further about how to allocate them, how to expand, how to achieve goals, and keep your focus on your targets—to become the person others envy.
In other words, you should hold onto this jealousy. Nietzsche offered a similar view when he said that every bit of jealousy drives you to understand that you shouldn't settle for the status quo too easily, because you will keep growing. Every person you currently envy and admire might become who you are in the future.
