﹝Start Cleaning Out Subtracting Friends Today﹞
Do you ever feel that as you age, some friends around you don't keep up? They don't just stagnate—they actually regress. The most practical way to test this is: when you share good news with them, they respond with unusual pessimism, pettiness, throwing cold water on your dreams, even hoping you won't move forward. These "subtracting friends" who obstruct your life really need to be cleaned out, and you should open your "talent account" to deposit friendships that multiply your life.
Actually, excellent leaders in the industry have connections with each other. When they collaborate, they recognize each other's values and bring mutual value rather than exploit each other. Many people don't know where to start. I believe the best way is to become a Giver first. Givers don't pursue mutual benefit so much as embody "altruism," "responsibility," and "social justice" from the inside out. Once you help others, they notice these qualities in you and trust you. When there are moments to help each other later, they become crucial turning points in breaking through life's barriers.
Friends who've known me for a long time know I really didn't like talking to strangers before, and disliked meeting new people. First, I thought it was unnecessary. Second, I was somewhat insecure and didn't know how to start conversations. Breaking the absolute silence always depended on others' outward attitudes, not on whether I wanted to chat. So I remained "conservative" but rigid. When I began seriously discussing life's future and mindsets, I suddenly realized there weren't many people whose thinking aligned with mine.
﹝Transferable Skills Add Value to Life﹞
Many friends don't want to face career and long-term life matters seriously after work. They lack reading, stop pursuing education, and would rather spend time complaining about the present without thinking about making changes from small places, cultivating their own leverage effect and workplace fuel. Many people view careers too short-sightedly while overlooking whether they've acquired "transferable skills."
To simply explain what "transferable skills" are: problem-solving ability, persuasion and communication skills, task completion ability, asking for and providing help, networking and emotional intelligence—these are all critical career skills, yet few people continuously improve them or specifically cultivate and clarify the differences among them.
It wasn't until late last year that I realized: my reluctance to deal with people stemmed from narrow thinking and a small circle, which constantly limited my abilities and confidence. So I decided to start cleaning up friendships and hold onto those who multiply my life, giving them genuine effort as a capable Giver.
I used to think stepping out of my comfort zone meant anxiety and fear, even revulsion. But after actually doing it, I discovered that beyond my known world, there are so many friends whose thoughts align with mine—people in the same fields who willingly spend their "spare" time contributing expertise, pursuing achievement and excellence, yet remaining practical and genuine, pulling each other forward.
﹝Joining XChange Led Me to a Group of Comfortable Partners﹞
This was one of the best decisions I made late last year. I originally thought I'd feel out of place and uncomfortable, but many partners felt like kindred spirits, meeting by fate. They understand that anxiety, so they're willing to be each other's strongest support. When you express ideas, they applaud louder than anyone; when you face opposing voices, they give you the greatest support, defending your autonomy and creativity.
In every discussion, we efficiently work out what's best for both sides. When you face confusion or crossroads in life, they help you evaluate pros and cons from a holistic perspective. Everyone possesses such "extraordinary skills"—clear logic, distinct thinking, well-articulated viewpoints and perspectives. This is what my confused, lost past self lacked, so I deeply cherish and appreciate it.
I discovered that this group of partners gave me an experience: "comfort." This comfort means you don't need to fake your preferences or dislikes; you can freely express your true thoughts without malice. Rather, exchanges happen because of shared goals and the desire for better outcomes. The key to this comfort is "trust"—even with short acquaintance time, it's a sustainable, healthy relationship.
