Many people have been asking for a post about resignation, and I'm writing this with a cautious heart. This post records my resignation experience, which brought me many lessons. Looking back now, there are still many ways I could have handled things better and more gracefully.
Before my first resignation from a full-time position, I spent months thinking it through, imagining countless reasons. I worried that simply saying "I just don't want to do this anymore" would seem immature, and that my manager might convince me to reconsider. So I delayed speaking up. But eventually, I figured things out, found my next job, and had no lingering attachments—so I went to talk to my manager.
At first, my mindset was quite naive—I thought it was simply a matter of leaving the company with valid reasons, standing firm, ensuring proper handover, and that would be it. If faced with temptations or inducements, I just had to resist them and everything would go smoothly!
But I was far too naive. A friend kept telling me "after you speak up, that's when it really begins," and they were absolutely right!
This happened more than two years ago. Let me explain why I wanted to resign. The main reason was interpersonal issues in the workplace. Almost regularly, I'd encounter some "gossip." Of course, my own work had its shortcomings too, but this "gossip" was more personal in nature, and it came from people I was close to. Though it spread privately, there was no way to pretend I didn't know. I went through a period of physical and mental exhaustion but never told my manager about it. (That was the worst example I could have set.)
Then, quite suddenly one day, I told my manager I wanted to resign. The reason was I'd found a new company—different industry, better reputation. I thought: "They can't hold me back now!" Sure enough, my manager heard that I had a new job lined up and said, "When people are job hunting, they consider many factors—salary, location, job content. So I believe you've given this considerable thought before speaking up. That's fine." I naively walked out of the meeting feeling relieved...
Starting the next day, what felt like a week-long campaign began. The senior executive who had always been kind to us walked up behind me, tapped my chair, and said, "Come get a coffee with me!" I gasped...and followed him out, repeating to myself over and over: don't let them convince you to stay, don't let them convince you to stay.
【Retention Tactic One: Transfer Departments】
The executive spoke: "I have no objection to you leaving for a new company. But from the company's perspective, we need to retain talent. Sometimes it's not that you don't fit this company—it's that this position doesn't fit you. Maybe you could transfer to a different department."
Objectively speaking, with my abilities, I would have been better suited to another department where the KPI evaluation methods would have been more beneficial—possibly with bonuses, or fairer, more objective data-based KPIs. But since I still didn't want to stay in that position, and the autonomy was somewhat limited, I declined.
【Retention Tactic Two: Appeal to Emotion】
The executive spoke again: "You're very capable, and think about it—you haven't even been at this company for two years. You haven't accomplished anything significant here. Leaving so abruptly might be premature. If you stay longer, the company might launch new ventures, and you could move into something you really want to do!"
This was certainly tempting. But I was restless at the time, and companies typically make grand promises. I couldn't wait two more years for the chance to do what I truly wanted. The interpersonal entanglements were my biggest concern, and I genuinely believed it would be pointless—even wasteful—to stay longer and accomplish something first. So I declined that too. (Looking back now, I think it might have actually been possible. I'll write a separate post about "why you should never leave a company because of anyone" another time.)
【Retention Tactic Three: I Understand Your Pain】
The executive seemed to have sensed something at this point and said, "I know there are people talking about you behind your back. You don't have to listen to them, because when we hear such things, we don't believe them and don't care. I've been talked about before too..." Such sympathetic persuasion touched my heart. But I could only think silently: I've dealt with far more than just that gossip. Still, I felt I should be gracious and leave some room for others, so I never revealed the full truth.
After the executive spent over an hour trying to convince me, I never wavered. I was deeply grateful that he took so much time to try to retain a fresh graduate who'd just entered the workforce, and he affirmed my abilities during the conversation. But the real reason for my resignation wasn't about the work itself. Still, I did ask around a bit about other departments.
The next day, both the executive and my manager asked me to stay and talked to me in the conference room again. They strongly urged me to transfer departments or adjust my work hours—wouldn't that solve the problem? But I felt transferring departments was a sensitive matter. Why?
(To be continued in Part 2...)
