Just after graduating from graduate school, when I first joined the company, I was so full of myself with a high degree and the ability to write news articles—after all, on my third day of work, a single article became the top post on the entire site. But this behavior also aroused the jealousy of "seniors" who had already been at the company for 1 to 3 years. The days that followed were quite difficult. For half a year straight, I had no idea I was being disliked. So whatever I did, whenever I made a mistake—like typos or accidentally opening a new discussion thread for an article instead of replying under the old community post—everything would be scrutinized and criticized, and even people who weren't my manager would severely reprimand me and demand "an explanation."
Of course, I did make mistakes, but these minor issues could often be resolved in a second with a private message based on our relationship, if handled privately. If it's blown up publicly, then the whole world knows, "Oh, looks like it's your turn to be targeted!" It's like being pinned on the magician's board, waiting for swords to shoot through from the front while being tied down, unable to move or dodge.
If you're lucky, the magician might shoot the blades through the gaps and miss you. If you're unlucky, the magician might deviate from the target and hit your hand or foot. Either way, it won't kill you in one blow, but it will definitely make you bleed and suffer, while the audience thinks it's all part of the show.
Yeah, it's laughable. But as someone fresh out of school, I really didn't know how to express myself. I asked a coworker whom I thought I had a decent relationship with, "Should I explain directly to the other person?" But this coworker said fake-sweetly, "That's just the type of person who will hate you even more the clearer you explain things," so after multiple times, I just stayed silent and didn't explain, letting the damage accumulate on me, scar after scar. (Extended reading: To the Betrayer: Thank You for Slapping Me to Show Me What "Real Society" Means)
During that period, I was probably a very negative person. Every morning when I woke up, I'd cry until work, for a solid 8-9 hours straight, no exaggeration. But I could only cry. When I encountered the other person, I could only smile and ignore them, or give them a cold face and ignore them. I never had the courage to express myself, or even when I finally had a chance to communicate face-to-face, I could only choose to stay silent and endure.
Actually, this kind of behavior is extremely immature and ignorant.
After working for a few years, I became braver. If anything violated my rights, I would speak up to defend myself. During one interview, I encountered a gangster who didn't understand the situation and accused us of breaking and entering to film. After I apologized, he demanded that I delete the footage or he would call the police. If it were the old me, I would have cried first, but in that moment, I immediately changed my expression to look fierce and spoke back harshly, saying directly "You come with me and find the owner!" "Come on!" "If you want to call the police, I'll call them right now!" I raised my voice repeatedly, and the other person didn't dare to act recklessly. He quietly followed behind me, even muttering sourly, "Why do you have to be so fierce," and not backing down, I raised my voice again, "I tried to explain things nicely to you and you wouldn't listen, and you dare to criticize others' attitude? Do you need to get your facts straight?"
In the end, this gangster really hadn't gotten the facts straight. We had already obtained the owner's consent before entering, but he didn't even apologize, and even dared to criticize others first. He was really extremely rude.
I have to say, once you're a grown adult, speaking up is a necessary survival skill. It's not about pretending nothing happened without logic or sense, crying and calling for help, expecting someone to come protect you like a god.
After growing up, when you feel wronged, don't just cry. When you only stay silent and don't explain, it's actually the most immature act that damages your own image, and you probably won't be able to change others' impressions of you for the rest of your life.
Once you're a grown adult, at least after graduating from university, the world won't be kind to you. Your silence won't shield you from the magician's blade—it will only leave you scarred. To survive in society, maintain integrity, attitude, and respect first, then talk about tolerance. If you have no bargaining chips and look down on everyone, I'm sorry, but no one will respect you, because you haven't even given yourself any dignity. Why should anyone else respect you? Who would care about you?
