I've been working in media journalism for six years now. When covering breaking news, I interview 3-4 people daily. Later, when I transitioned to feature reporting, I had to conduct in-depth conversations with sources every 1-2 weeks. My interviewees ranged from political officials, CEOs of large corporations, and startup founders to grandmothers at the market and children.

Possibly 2 people and an indoor scene （Photo / Interview with Dr. Xu Lanfang）

How do you guide strangers you've never met before to share their true thoughts? This requires technique!

First, you must be genuine
Relationships between people are reciprocal—the other person can absolutely feel your sincerity!

Being genuine means you're truly willing to spend time understanding a person, willing to do your homework before meeting them.

Doing your homework is actually the harder part.

How do I do it?

  1. Extensively research the person's social media
    I look at even very old university photos and award records; at a more advanced level, I study their growth trajectory, including how their writing style, clothing, and appearance have changed from 5 years ago to now, to better understand their mindset evolution.

  2. Note the person's sensitivities
    Because everyone has places they don't want touched. Even if you don't mean harm, simply asking about certain topics can be disrespectful.

For example, I knew an entrepreneur who had disagreements with their co-founder. When I first met them, I knew not to touch on this topic. It wasn't until 2 years later, after building trust in our relationship, that I was able to ask further and get answers. This is what I mean by "being genuine."

Step 2: Ask with sincerity
Show the other person your genuineness, let them feel your sincerity, and then ask sincere questions about things you truly don't know but need to understand.

Even if the question is simple and something they could answer easily in their field of expertise, if you don't know, you shouldn't be afraid to ask.

You can say: "I'm sorry, but there are some aspects of this topic I'm still unclear about. I'm afraid I might have misunderstood, could I check something with you?"
Most people will accept this.

Other opening phrases include:
"So what you're saying is⋯"
👉 This further confirms, showing you're listening, but maybe they explained it too complexly at first.

"If⋯ what would you do?"
👉 You want to guide them to explain how they'd handle something and their perspective. You can phrase it this way. When facing real events, people tend to be reserved, but hypothetical scenarios don't have this effect, even when the situation is the same.

"Everyone thinks you're a certain type of person. Do you agree?"
👉 You might think they're a certain type, but "you think" is too subjective, so using "people think," or "some say" is more objective.

These phrasing methods won't make people feel offended.

Step 3: Questioning techniques
Sometimes interviewees won't have a real dialogue with you—they'll only say yes or no, right or wrong.
This is mainly because they don't want to be too detailed, or they've become so used to something that they think you and they see it the same way, so they respond this way.

☑️ In this case, we can use these questioning techniques to guide them:

  1. How so?
    With this phrase, the other person can easily express their thoughts. Sometimes they might think you're ignorant, but that's okay—as long as you know your goal.

  2. Can you describe what the situation was like back then?
    Because when they answer yes or no, it's really hard to continue the conversation, so you need to further say "describe it," which lets them recall and paint a detailed picture so you can understand better and avoid misinterpretation.

  3. So do you think⋯?
    After listening to them describe something, if you feel they haven't gotten to the main point, you can use this phrase to help them.
    No matter what you say after this, they'll continue and express whether they agree or disagree.

Step 4: Eye contact
To let a stranger open up and discuss things from their heart, you must focus on looking at them, letting them know you're listening. This makes them feel safe.

Then, when they're speaking earnestly, use "nodding" to reassure them that you agree, that you understand, that you've entered their world. If your interviewee cries, don't show pity. You should affirm them, let them know you empathize, and position yourself as someone standing beside them to cheer them on.

Eye contact plus nodding is a great way to build trust.

Hope this article helps you :)

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