(Image above / Japanese drama Ryu-Oh's School / I really liked the main character's courageous attitude in pursuing himself)
Finally, we've reached the last installment of important lessons from my first job. There was a time when I really hated working—I'd complain to friends almost daily, "Why do we even have to work!" And I meant it seriously, it wasn't just joking around! Now that some time has passed, looking back, I realize I've grown quite a bit. Even people close to me have told me, "You've become less impatient!"
If my former supervisor saw this article, they would definitely question how I have the right to talk about this. The reason I describe it this way is because the person who understood "learning to express your own stance" the least was probably me.
How should I put it—in the previous post, I mentioned that I'm someone very concerned with what others think. Not only that, I also "fear being contradicted" and "fear criticism." I'm always worried there's something wrong with me. I often interpret any negative words from others as criticism—that's the kind of overthinking personality I have.
Worst of all, I didn't dare express my own thoughts when facing issues. Whatever others said, I'd just agree, unwilling to voice my own opinions. I was like a closed jar. My supervisor had to ask me many times before I'd share even a few thoughts. (I'm sorry, supervisor><)
"Say what you have to say, hurry up. You're not a college student anymore." This is what I once heard a supervisor say to a new employee, nearly losing patience, yet the person still hemmed and hawed.
But from another angle, standing in the supervisor's position, what they cared about was "whether there are any loopholes," "what errors need to be corrected," "whether we're keeping up with the timeline." Their mind was focused on how to complete the whole project, not "your feelings."
We often make a mistake in thinking that others find our ideas stupid, or that others care about our feelings. But as a manager, from past to present, they've definitely encountered many different types of colleagues and employees, even various unexpected situations. When they ask for your opinion, they mainly want to understand how things are progressing, what your strengths and abilities are, and how to allocate human resources.
Of course, even a little bit, your opinions and thoughts are one of the elements that keeps things moving forward. If you clearly could make things better but don't speak up in time, you might end up in a situation where people say "why didn't you say anything?" Instead, you put yourself in an "I don't know what to do" predicament.
Only later did I understand
(Image / Japanese drama Ryu-Oh's School / It's very important to maturely express your thoughts and assert your position)
Learning to express your own stance is a sign of mature work attitude
But this doesn't mean we have to seek the spotlight or take others' credit. Rather, it means maintaining your own judgment and perspective on matters, and expressing them completely, fighting for what you deserve and what you want. Even if the other person opposes you and pushes back, as long as it's not deliberate hostility, it's actually a form of "communication" and "discussion." Both sides are simply trying to convince each other or understand the full picture. If you're someone willing to express yourself, others will know you're someone who can communicate, and naturally you'll make like-minded friends on your career path.
As a newcomer, when you spot problems, ask more questions instead of saying nothing, not speaking up when facing difficulties, or believing that speaking up will make people dislike you. Because if you don't fight for certain things in time, your self-image will become fixed over time, and others will be even less willing to understand your intentions, your boundaries, your needs, or your wants.
When arranging your position and assigning work, they might worry you're dissatisfied, worry that you actually have opinions but won't voice them. As a result, once you're actually misunderstood, you complain and blame, asking how they could fail to understand you. Instead, you end up with labels like "difficult to work with," "weak," "not suitable"—and this isn't good for your colleagues or superiors in the workplace.
However, I know sometimes you just don't have enough courage. You want to cooperate with everyone, want to go along with the crowd, because that feels safest.
But in the workplace, you are an important screw, and more importantly, you should become a person with distinct characteristics, working to make the organization better, and not become a decorative vase that can't speak, silently watching others fight for what they want while you just quietly envy them.
But whatever you do, don't overcorrect. Don't harshly criticize everything just because, thinking only of your own interests. That's not "fighting for yourself," that's "being self-righteous," thinking everyone respects you. But actually, to be honest, when others respect you, it's not because you're excellent, but because "they are excellent!"
【Important Work Insights Series - Five Articles from Part 2】
Important Lessons from My First Job (Part 2-1): Choose Not Just a Good Company, But a Good Manager
Important Lessons from My First Job (Part 2-2): Stick to the Facts, Don't Let Emotions Lead You
Important Lessons from My First Job (Part 2-4): You're Not Omnipotent, Don't Take Everything On
